LIU JIA TIAN: This dream is about me and my boyfriend. We were at his place, it was late, he had already fallen asleep, but I couldn’t sleep. I was listening to music on my mp3 player, a song called “Baby, how can I prove my innocence” by the band “Siwu”. I was listening to this song and looking at my boyfriend’s face, he was lying on the bed with his face turned towards me.
Suddenly, without really thinking about it, I got up and took a knife out of a drawer. I looked at him for a while, then without hesitating I cut his throat with the knife. He woke up and looked at me with a very strange look in his eyes. I can’t really describe that look, it was scared and puzzled, but there was more than that in his eyes. He was staring at me, with his neck bleeding, then his mouth and nose also started to bleed, I saw little swirls of blood coming out of them. The house filled with the smell of blood. He tried to creep towards me, so I got off the bed and went to the door.
His blood was all over the place, on the bed, on the floor. He kept crawling towards me and finally reached the door. He almost caught me, so I jumped on the bed again. He turned back towards the bed, still crawling on the floor. All that time he kept staring at me. I couldn’t hear what he was saying because of the blood in his mouth, he was bleeding all the time, everything was covered with blood. I looked at him without any expression on my face and my mind was totally blank as well, I wasn’t thinking anything at all. When he reached the bed again, he died. He wasn’t moving anymore but he kept bleeding. I still had the knife in my hand, and continued looking at him. His eyes were open, even now that he was dead, and they were looking at me.
Finally, I woke up because the smell of blood was so strong. I find this dream very mysterious. The strangest thing is that I had this dream while I was riding on the bus, I had fallen asleep listening to my mp3 player, and when I woke up, the song that came up next was the song from the dream: “Baby, how can I prove my innocence”. That was very strange. I met my boyfriend in June, and in July I went back to my hometown for the summer vacation. I was so in love with him, I totally lost myself, I didn’t go to class, I just stayed at his place all day long, tidying up and washing his clothes. I wouldn’t do anything else until he came back from work and then we would eat together and go to sleep together. This went on for about a month, then something came between us and we broke up. Actually without any real reason. I think this dream is quite significant and I remember it quite often.
I’m still at university, and I probably should go to class more often, but I don’t. I think I’m kind of a bad girl, I don’t go to class, I always run away. My teachers say I give them a headache. I like rock music, so I go to rock concerts on the weekend. I usually go out with my friends, we get something to eat and a few drinks. I like travelling to other cities. Except for the cities on the coast, I went almost everywhere in China. I like this way of living more and more. When I go to a city that I don’t know, I feel very relaxed. I don’t like Xi’an at all, despite all the culture and the architecture. It’s too heavy for me. I like the atmosphere in other cities that I don’t know.